How "Not Thinking" Can Do Us Good

The title may sound a bit weird. Since young, we have been taught to think, plan, and analyze every single factor before we decide to do anything. 

Being able to analyze and plan before we do anything is a good thing, but sometimes for many people this kind of habit might become a hindrance. 

Many of us are experts in analyzing and planning, but not all of us are able to take action.

Over thinking things might leave to procrastination, which is the biggest obstacle to success for most of us. 

Personally I'm struggling to overcome this problem. There are many opportunities available out there, but I have not been able to fully utilize them due to one single reason. I tend to think to much. 

In alphabet, S is located between R and T. So is SUCCESS, which is somewhere between being RECKLESS and THINKING too much. 

Result = Plan x Action 

If an action is not well planned, it will result in nothing. Same thing happens to people who plan properly but never take any actions.

The question now is "how to prevent this from happening?"

Arrange a goal and a timeline

Meaning that we must try to set a specific goal and how long will it take for us to do it.

The goal must be something achievable.  By setting up a specific goal, it can provide us with the extra motivation that we may need to immediately take action.

Second danger that may arise from thinking too much is fear.

Some people tends to be pessimistic when they are facing conditions where they are not too familiar with. This pessimism creates fear. Fear is something natural, meaning that every single living person may feel this when they are facing the unknown. Great people are those who can view the "unknown" as opportunity. 

This kind of people possess the mental strength and the optimism to be able to step out of their comfort zone and embrace the unknown. Mental strength refers to how much stress you can handle and tolerate. While optimism refers to how you view things.

Mental strength is naturally different from one and another. But even for those with weaker mentality, there is still a solution, which is by accumulating experience. We may not be able to control what will happen to us, but we can control how we will react. By continuously pushing ourselves to the limit and always try our best, we can actually train up our mental strength.

For my case, by learning to take rejections and disappointment, I have slowly build up my tolerance to failure. 

Optimism is a state of mind. Being optimistic means being able to see the silver lining in every single black cloud that we may face. 

Many amazing success stories out there tells us that simply by being positive, we can reallyovercome everything that comes along our way.

~~~Success is 35% Ideas, 60% Sweat, and 5% Luck~~~

Note: By writing this stuff, I tend to learn more things about myself and the direction I should take. Currently struggling to motivate myself more and more every single day. >_<

Taking a Hit ~ Winning the Match

In a boxing game, both boxers experience what it feels to be punched. The only difference is how they react after taking the hit. The winners are those who are strong enough to stand up and fight back. While the losers just give up and stay down until the count is over.

Failure happens in life. Not a single person in this world walked through their path of life without failing. Some people might fall into frustration and lose their initial ambition or passion. Some people climb up from the fall and emerge stronger than before.

I've seen some people who was very hardworking. But when they fell, they became hopeless and pessimistic. Different people have different mental tolerant. When someone encounters bigger problem than what they can take, it sometimes result to trauma.

Here are some of my thoughts on what should be done to overcome the pain of getting hit and move forward.

1. Take Ownership

The first step is to take ownership of what happened. Meaning that we must keep in our mind that we are responsible for everthing that has happened. Don't try to blame others or give out excuses. Learn to take the result as something that we have produced due to our own actions. Winners don't make excuses. ( I'm still trying to master this one =p )

It's easy to pass the blame to someone else. But in order to move forward, we must acknowledge that there was something wrong in what we did. If we can't even acknowledge and identify the mistake, we will keep on repeating the same mistake over and over again.

2. Managing Disappointment

Adjust a positive mindset. Positive mindset helps us recover from a fall. The way to do it is to implant positive thoughts in our mind. 

" Every successful people has experienced failure in their life before they make it. Meaning that I'm still on track!"

" As long as I managed to learn something from the mistake, the whole process is worth it."

" I have the potential to succeed because I try harder than everyone else."

" I know I can make it because I believe so."

Just remember that failing is completely normal, but giving up is for losers.

3. Reflecting

After getting through all the heartache and disappointment, what needs to be done is self reflection.

Reflection means learning from past mistakes. Try to think of all the things we can take as a lesson from the incident. Come up with solutions to prevent similar problem from occuring in the future.

4. Push and Pull Factor

Mastering the push and pull factor enables us to be able to take a hit and use it as a motivation to be better in what we do.

Push factor is something that we use to drive us forward. Usually it refers to past disappointment, suffering, and other negative things that happened in the past. Push factor makes us move forward and not be complacent in order to avoid experiencing similar feeling.

Pull factor refers to a reward or a short term goal that we use in order to motivate us. By properly setting short term achievable goals, we can force ourselves to perform better in everthing that we do. 

"In the end of the day, the winner is not the one who throw the most number of punches. A winner is the one who is able to take the most number of hits and still be standing at the end of the match."

The Art of Pushing Your Boundaries

Here are some of my thoughts on how we should push ourselves and move forward in life.

1. Boundary of Comfort Zone.

Some people say that our comfort zone equals to our money zone. Meaning that the amount of success you can obtain is proportionate with how much you are willing to push yourself.

We often listen to stories about great people who started out from a difficult background. If we think it through, maybe the reason why they became successful is that they have experienced hardship in their life.

"Things that does not kill you will only make you stronger"

Human has a natural instinct for survival. That is the reason why people who are pushed to the limit may sometimes be able to do things beyond his limit.

The key to push our boundaries is to set our mind to always place ourselves in a do or die situation. By having this kind of mindset, we are pushed to perform up to our maximum standard.

The second step is consistency. By always giving our best in every single thing that we do, we are able to push our limit higher and higher.

When you are struggling, use your hope to pull you forward. When you have achieved success, use your past failures and sufferings to remind you not to be complacent.

2. Boundary of Mind

The second boundary that often hinders our growth is our own mind.

There are tons of books out there stating how powerful Human mind is. We can see throughout history how human mind managed to produce creation and destruction.

Different upbringing creates different boundaries in people's mind. What we need to do is to explore our own mind and identify incorrect mindsets that always limit our potential.

For example, I was always taught that just by being a morally good person is more than enough. Money is an extra. As long as you are happy, it may not be necessary. This caused me over 18 years of life spent with no ambition and motivation to put in my best in what I do. Luckily I just came to realize how harsh the real world is. Since then, I tried to push myself harder to be successful. Because I believe that money is a tool for me to make a difference in my life and other people's life. I don't worship money, but I believe you can't make a difference if you can't even control your own life.

The first step in achieving success is adjusting our mindset. Having a correct mindset is like having a compass. We may walk through different paths in life, but as long as the compass is pointing to the right direction, we will still arrive at the destination (achieve our final goal). 

This is the reason why great people can repeat their success over and over again even if they fall. Success is a result. Ability to become successful is a skill. It can be learned. Once we master it, it stays with us for the rest of our lives.

Great people are not created as perfect beings. They equip themselves with the ability to get up when they fall, to endure when they are suffering, and to look forward when they are far behind.

Balancing Life ~ Managing Expectations

One of the most difficult thing in pursuing your career is to be able to balance your life and manage expectations. Each and everyone of us are guided by a different set of values unique only to us. This makes the composition of a "balanced life" different from one another. 

The wheel above shows different aspects to consider in our life. I can seperate them in 3 categories: physical, emotional and spiritual. 

Physical aspect of our life mainly deals with the fulfilling the basic necessities such as food, clothing and shelter. 

Emotional aspect on the other hand, envelopes all that we strive to achieve, for example: Working hard to buy an expensive sports car is not a physical need. It is an act based on the emotional aspect, which is to fulfill the sense of pride. Trying to spend more time for the family is a way of fulfilling our need in giving affection to others. 

Spiritual aspect is something that in neglected by many people. Spiritual aspect provides stronger constitution for the mental state of each and everyone.

The second part of the problem is Managing Expectations. Most people have no difficulties in balancing their life, but hit the bottle neck on trying to meet everyone's expectations. 

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A salaryman is struggling to balance his life and trying to please everyone. The wife always complains that he never spend enough time with his family. His boss always pushes him to work harder and take longer hours. His parents are not happy with what he is earning and ask him to change his career. He himself wants to be successful in order to achieve a sense of fulfillment. But the problem is, it is impossible for him to do every single thing that he is asked to.

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A sample case from the passage above happens to many people. The problem arises because the man is trying to make everyone happy. 

I attended a seminar by T Harv Eker few months ago. Although it was not so great and full of hard selling, but he did come out with a few interesting points. One of the things he mentioned is this. "Do not try to make everyone happy, because it is impossible to do so." 

We are all adults with our own judgement. The thing that we should do is to choose the direction in life as what we see fit and strive to pursue it. 

One thing that my boss taught me is that people only sees the end result. We can work our ass off or even beg on the streets, but once we become successful, people wont say anything about it. But if we ended up as a failure, that's where the badmouthing starts. 

I'm still young, lots of chance to try, fail, and try again. I believe I can make it in life. 

How about you?